No Shame November.
Each post should have been a look into me. What makes me ashamed. What I have to be ashamed of.
I tried to start it once. After taking the idea from Kelli, (
http://kelli-alisvolatpropriis.blogspot.com/) I thought I would write about how terrible I am at keeping in touch. What I wrote came out cliche and childish. Needless to say, I hit delete before it even made the homepage. I kept meaning to try again.
but...... obviously, No Shame November 2011 did not happen. November is coming to a close and will soon be laid to rest for another year.
This is a brief epitaph of what No-Shame November should have been for me.
1. I am ashamed of my lack of volunteer hours.
2. I am ashamed of my grades-no they are not terrible, not even bad. But they should be better.
3. I am ashamed of how difficult it is for me to share my feelings. Everyone has them. Why do I have to hide them?
4. I am ashamed of not keeping in touch with a few of my best friends. They deserve weekly contact at a minimum.
5. I am ashamed at my lack of direction. I want to know exactly what I want to do by now.
6. I am ashamed I get ashamed when I have better opportunities than both my sisters ever did.
7. I am ashamed that two of my best friends over the past five years have had eating disorders, been depressed, and/or cut them selves. and I never knew until long after the fact.
8. I am ashamed I do not have the power or the know-how to stop the friend I do know that is cutting now. She wont even take the time to listen to me.
9. I am ashamed I've let myself slip into the routine of coming home and shutting my door, whether I have homework or not.
10. I am ashamed I let myself get myself down, far too often.
No Shame November 2011 will never get justice. I don't have enough days to get these done, but maybe Round 2012 will get a shot. Maybe I'll be able to work through some of these before than.
